(TN credit to U/Parking_External_182)
"Dealing with a simple burgalry can require 1000 process steps and 70 forms to be completed as a case goes through the Criminal Justice System. That can't be right."
The Wet Bandits, the sticky theives who can't catch a break from Home Alone.
Theodore Peterson, The one person you would not like to live next to from Hello Neighbour.
Crime is a spectrum. We tend to hear about the worst aspect of it, the most dangerous of crime. But, did you know, that there's 2.5 million burglaries per year? That's insane. So, what if we take some of the greatest home invaders in fiction, and put them against the ultimate home? Will The Wet Bandits finally achieve a sticky victory? Or will Mr. Peterson stop them in their tracks? Come alone to Saul's VS Blog to find out who wins this DEATH BATTLE!
Before we go anywhere.
This blog will cover what is considered canon for Home Alone. This includes the main two movies of Home Alone 1 and 2. Home Alone 4 will also be considered for Marv, even though the continunity of that film is wildly contested by fans. (Everyones age being off, some of Kevins siblings being missing, etc etc.) The Home Alone games will be looked at, but only mentioned where relevent. Many of these games go against the established Home Alone canon.
The Neighbour is a different beast to tackle. For him, everything is canon. The main material will be the games, so Hello Neighbour 1 and 2, Hello Neighbour Hide and Seek, Secret Neighbour, Hello Engineer. However, Hello Neighbour seemingly takes an "everything is canon." approach to the spinoffs. So, the Hello Neighbour show and books will be consulted where it doesn't directly interfere with the canon.
There's also the nature of this matchup. The Wet Bandits VS Theodore Peterson, or Mr. Peterson if you don't know him personally, thrives on an idea that Death Battle doesn't often do. That is, of course, location. Death Battle usually relies on the idea of having a neutral location. The scenario presented in this matchup is The Wet Bandits breaking into Mr. Peterson's home. The only other time, that I remember, Death Battle considered a locational advantage was with Scrooge McDuck VS Shovel Knight, with the traps within the manor and Money Vault. Now the question is, what home?
Throughout the many material of Hello Neighbour, the primary house that Mr. Peterson has resided in has changed. Ignoring the changes from alphas to betas, Mr. Peterson has had three different locations we can call his home. He's had his home from Hello Neighbour 1, which changes between the different acts. Hello Neighbour 2, a smaller blue house. And Secret Neighbour, a massive tower of a home. I'll be mainly taking things from Hello Neighbour 1, as that's seemingly his main home. Features from all other homes will be considered under the "Home." Section for Mr. Peterson.
I also want to explain Secret Neighbour classes here. In Secret Neighbour, the Neighbour has access to four different forms. Scary, Clown, Butcher, and Ghost. I spent awhile debating on if I should put these versions of the Neighbour in, but ultimately went with yes. For one, these are all specifically Mr. Peterson and referred to as The Neighbour. The Clown Neighbour and the Butcher are shown in the show as well, although in a dream. The designs of Secret Neighbour, the many inventions of Mr. Peterson in that game, are on the walls of his house in the show. They're literally shown as inventions he is designing.
There's also the identity of The Guest. Who is The Guest?
Hello Guest! Now, many theories about The Guest and who it is under the mask. Is he the Neighbour? is he another entity? Could he be a seperate monster entirely? Let's review what we have in canon.
In Secret Neighbour, The Guest is a character that The Neighbour can be.
In the book "Reset day." The Guest is messaging the protag of this book. At the end of the story, The Guest kidnaps the mother of the protag and sends a picture of The Neighbour, himself, to the portag.
In Hello Guest, The Neighbour is seemingly haunted by the shadow of the guest when he's watching TV. When the TV flashes, both Peter and The Guest are gone. Later in the game, Aaron is trapped within a cell and 'talked' to by The Guest. They make a deal with each other that Aaron may use the powers of The Guest and becomes him. They encounter Mr. Peterson, who The Guest chases. Mr. Peterson accepts his fate and is about to kill Mr. Peterson. This sequence ends with The Guest actually not killing Mr. Peterson, and handing over a key to let Aaron escape.
In the graphic novel "The Raven Brooks Disaster." Mr. Peterson is directly called out by the protagonist, Ragina, for looking like The Guest. Mr. Peterson has to go underwater to manipulate a circuit breaker to make sure that the whole town doesn't flood thanks to his weather machine. He's attacked by The Guest, choked out, and seemingly drowns. When Ragina goes under the water to stop the breaker herself, she's attacked by The Guest. After kicking him and stopping it, Mr. Peterson appears and begins to act evil once again and looks like The Guest. He's also talking to a crow throughout the entire novel.
There's just so much evidence leading to this, that I can't just deny that Mr. Peterson could be The Guest
This is incredibly important because The Guest has his own nest of supernatural powers. Get it, Nest?
Also anything mentioned in the book will have stock images over them. I could only get audio books for these, sorry.
With all of that being said, let's meet our combatants.
Background
The Wet Bandits
Kevin McCallister was only eight years old when his parents, no, his entire family left him behind in his own home. For Kevin, this was nothing but a paradise. He could do whatever a kid could desire. Eat as much candy as he wants, watch movies with violence, and never go to bed. Kevin didn't know that his home was the target of some of the greatest theives known to man. The Wet Bandits.
Or sometimes called The Sticky Bandits, this duo contains of Harry and Marv. They're notable criminals across Winnetka, Illinois. How do they plan? It's simple. Harry is the leader of the duo, the more intellegent and planning. He disguises himself as a Police Officer to check out houses that they want to steal. Marv is the theoretical muscle, helping with these robberies. The only issue? They hit the wrong house. Earlier, Harry had disguised himself as a police officer and gotten access to the McCallister's home. When Kevin was out of his home, he was almost hit by the Bandits. After recognising Harry from his gold tooth, and overhearing how the Bandits wanted to rob him, set up some traps.
Harry and Marv fell for, mostly, every single trap set up that night by Kevin. They went blow for blow with blowtorches, paint cans, large falls, spiders, literally everything. They didn't care about the money anymore, they just wanted Kevin dead. At the end of the night, they had Kevin pinned against a door. What would they do? They'd torture him, nibble off his little fingers. It wasn't until Old Man Marley, a 'scary' old man Kevin had made friends with, snuck up behind the bandits and knocked them out. The police soon came and took the bandits away.
It's a year later! Harry and Marv have broken out of prison thanks to a riot. They're in New York, ready to start a new spree of crime. Luckily, depending on who you ask, Kevin is also in New York alone. The Wet Bandits, who want their revenge, chase Kevin althroughout New York. Kevin isn't defenseless, he throws everything he can at these bandits. Bricks, high falls, slipping on grease, the lot. Again, it takes a 'scary' individual to take down the bandits for good. This time it's a lady who likes pigeons.
This is where our story ends for Harry, but Marv comes back in Home Alone 4. Marv and Harry have gone their seperate ways, since Harry's plans has landed the two in prison more times than he can count. Now he's with his wife, Vera. Marvs mother, Molly, also joins in. Marv comes across Kevin, since his dad is going to marry a rich women. Marv, alongside his family, are defeated again.
Harry and Marv may not be the smartest, the most strong, or even good bandits. But you know what they are? Iconic. Ho! Ho! Ho! You filthy animal.
Mr. Peterson
The town of Raven Brooks has always, for lack of a better word, been strange. Reports of Forest Protecters, strange weather, a corrupt mayor. Hell, only Raven Brooks technology works inside of the town. (E.G you can't use Facebook, you haev to use Facebrooks or whatever they call it). At the centre of all of this terror, was Theodore Masters Peterson. Better known to everyone as The Neighbour.
Mr. Peterson grew up in Raven Brooks with his parents, who were Meteorologists. They studied the weird weather of Raven Brooks. What did Mr. Peterson do? He left when he was an adult, moving to Germany. In Germany he would start a family. A wife, a duaghter, and a son. Mr. Peterson worked as a rollercoaster engineer, making some of the wildest rides in the world. Tragedy would strike when four teenagers would die and cause Mr. Peterson and his family to flee.
Lucky for him, or maybe unlucky? His father and mother had left him something in his will. His old home, a place where he and his family could stay. So he returned to Raven Brooks. At this point, what else could you do? He was approached by The Golden Apple corporation to build a new theme park. Due to stress, a strict deadline of one year, and perhaps something more sinister, another child would die. This time it was a 7 year-old-girl.
Stay with me here. It turns out that the entire town of Raven Brooks were being controlled by the rich elite. They owned a device that allowed them to change fate. They could manipulate the weather, get money, increase their luck. The Forest Protectors had been using this to make everyone in the town unlucky. Mr. Peterson teamed up with The Puzzle Master, a man who was being targetted by the Forest Protectors, to end them once and for all. Mr. Peterson had a replica of this device, something that he lost. Luckily for him, his son and daughter, Aaron and Mya, had teamed up with their friends to stop them.
It's around this time that his son, Aaron, would meet Hello Neighbour 1 protag Nicky Roth. Aaron and Nicky would have a strong bond, although Mr. Peterson always seemed to get in the way. One day, a very fateful one, Mr. Peterson and his wife would end up in a horrible car crash. This killed his wife, but didn't kill him. Now a single father with two kids who got on his nerves, he became much more distant. Aaron and Mya began to argue, one of their games ended up in a fight. Aaron pushed Mya off the roof, causing her to die.
Panic and despair went through Mr. Peterson. He broke, having a manic breakdown. He grabbed Aaron and locked the boy in the safest place in the house, the basement. Nicky tried to go looking for his friend, ending up in the basement, Mr. Peterson wanted a friend for Aaron. Aaron describes his father as not evil, just broken. I mean, tell that to the town who he almost destoryed by causing a flood using a weather station.
We don't actually have an end to Mr. Petersons story. In Reset Day, the latest in the timeline, the town of Raven Brooks is stuck in a town-wide timeloop. Anyone who enters experiences one week over and over again, only those with certain charms uneffected by the time loop.
What does Mr. Peterson have planned? only time can tell.
Experience and Skill.
The Wet Bandits
The Bandits are wanted criminals and can actually commit crimes rather well. In the second film, they plan to rob a store known as Duncan's Toy Chest. They actually manage to break in and steal the money from this place, with Kevin being the only thing they didn't consider. Not only that, they do seem to have some semblance of knowledge around traps. They specifically avoid the paint can trap that Kevin tries to use on them again in New York. The Bandits even manage to break out of prison, in an off-screen riot we only hear through whispers. They do possess some not-so-great showings of intellegence but we'll save that for the weaknesses.
Mr. Peterson
This friendly neighbour suprisingly has good experience. His backstory details him building an entire theme pack, the Golden Apple Amusement Park to be exact. He also, in the books, built over thousands of theme parks. Not only that he's built all of the traps around his house, something that's incredibly impressive as we go further into the blog. He doesn't have much combat experience outside of capturing children, but in the last episode of the Hello Neighbour show animated show, he is shown fighting trained police officers. This is backed up by The Puzzle master book, where he fights one of the cult members. Also, even though he only captures children, he has many showings of on the fly trap making and deception thanks to Secret Neighbour.
Equipment.
The Wet Bandits
Crowbar
The bandits are your standard criminals, so they carry around Crowbars. They can use these to either break objects or beat people up. Although, they usually accidently hit each other with this.
Dodge Ram Van
Harry and Marv drive around in a Dodge Ram Van with "Oh-kay plumbing and heating." attached to the side. This helps them go unoticed during their crimes.
Police Officer outfit
This outfit is worn by Harry to gain easy access into individuals houses who trust the police. The outfit is exclusive to Harry, but i'm sure Marv could pull it off.
Sticky glove
An invention that Marv made, this Sticky glove. The Sticky glove allows him to stick to small objects. We've seen it stick to pennies, hats, anything small Marv can get his hands on.
Handgun
For Harry's neutral special, he wields a gun. We never actually see Harry fire this as it's covered in goo before he can throw it out.
Mr. Peterson
Shovel
Lantern
Lanterns are so cool, they're so awesome. That's why Mr. Peterson has one.
Hammer
Ever needed to beat someone up? Mr. Peterson has a hammer. Ok, it's mainly for putting wood up.
Meat Cleaver
In Waking Nightmare, Mr. Peterson has a meat cleaver he uses to cut through meat.
Tomato
One of your five-a-day, Mr. Peterson can throw tomatos at you from a great distance if you're out of range. This will disorientate anyone who is hit by it with a red splash.
Glue Trap
Mr. Peterson can throw Glue traps which slow down any foes who are hit, needing time to wipe this glue down.
Bear Trap
The Neighbour can place down Bear Traps. This can be inside and outside of his house, with it taking three seconds to set the first trap, and five for the second. If anyone steps in this bear trap they'll be stunned for twelve seconds.
Lockpick
In the best show ever, Hello Neighbour the animated series, Mr. Peterson uses a lockpick to break a lock. Ironic.
Rope
Rope is one of Mr. Petersons favourite thing to use. If its for strangling or tying people up, as he does in the second graphic novel, he always seems to have some on him.
Welding gear
Binoculars
Mr. Peterson will always see you coming with his Binoculars.
Sack
Mr. Peterson has a sack in his trunk. This can carry things such as a huge amount of gold coins, or any naughty children he captures.
Scotch Tape
When Nicky first breaks into Mr. Petersons home, he places Scotch Tape over his door to know when he returns.
Bolt Cutters
Mr. Peterson possesses a normal pair of Bolt Cutters. What else can I say?
Truck
Despite being mocked by the community for being a bad driver, Mr. Peterson actually does possess a truck he can drive.
Car
He also owns this red car, which is perfectly funcional. Maybe we're giving Mr. Peterson less credit than he deserves on account of his wife.
He also owns this red car, which is perfectly funcional. Maybe we're giving Mr. Peterson less credit than he deserves on account of his wife.
Children's mask
Smoke bombs
This 20m Smoke Bomb causes individuals to not be able to see and take damage for 20 seconds. You have to run through the smoke before being knocked down. Oh, Mr. Peterson is immune to his own smoke bombs in both Neighbour and child form.
The Guest in Reset Day demonstrates the same ability. By opening his mouth, he can let out large gusts of smoke.
Meat Hook
As the Butcher, Mr. Peterson can use his meat hook to pull you in. It's also incredibly useful for seperating children so he can kill them one by one.
The House
As spoken in "before we go anywhere." Mr. Peterson will have access to his home from Hello Neighbour 1. The Secret Neighbour house is way too big and complicated to figure out, while he doesn't actually have a home in Hello Neighbour 2 as he's hiding in the Church. The home from the show is also a good contender, but they have similar form and composition. Given the messy timeline of Hello Neighbour, this is his most latest home so makes the most sense to go with. Anything from other houses will be considered though.
The Houses that Mr. Peterson resides him can have multiple features. In act one of the first game, the house is the one above. Simple two story home with traps in it, good right?
Well he upgrades it to have big walls by the end of act 1. There's barely any exit, and the walls have barbed wire on the top.
Note: I won't be running through every room within Mr. Petersons home, it would take way too long and they're inconsistent in size and location. I'll only be going over super relevent locations that are important like...
The Basement
What's Hello Neighbour without The Basement? The Basement within Hello Neighbour is blocked by locks, so you'll need keys to get down there. When you do make it, The Basement has winding and changing turns that make people get lost in it. Nicky Roth described Peterson as having extreme knowledge of the Basement, although the lack of light can slow him down. The Basement has electrical powered gates, large fence walls, and speakers which The Neighbour can speak to you on. He can also just re-lock it and make you starve to death.
Panic Room
The Panic Room has a big red button in it. When hit, it reveals every single person within the house is revealed.
Bookcase
"You've gone mad." No I have not! These Bookcases can actually be useful. They have the Scooby-Doo effect of when you pull on a book, it can take you to another room.
Locks
This one should be pretty clear, but Mr. Peterson has multi-color locks placed all around his home. You need specific color keys to open that specific lock.
Keycard terminal
Some of the doors in Mr. Petersons home need a keycard to get into. It's mounted to the basement door in the main game, and the armoured doors in Secret Neighbour.
Cameras
Mr. Peterson has a ton of these around his house. It works like a motion sensor, making a sound whenever an individual passes through it. Mr. Peterson will hear this, and run to it. He can set up cameras around the house if needed, and repair any that have been damaged. If you throw an object, you can destory the camera. Only by shutting off the power to Mr. Petersons house can you truly get rid of the cameras.
Magnets
In Mr. Petersons trunk, he possesses a magnet. This magnet can bring metal objects to him, like lockpicks and crowbars.
Strengthening Machine
This is going to sound vague, but the Strengthening machine powers up The Neighbour can use this to increase his abilites that he can use.
Crowbar
While never shown using it, Mr. Peterson possesses a Crowbar he can use in his home if he needs.
Mannequins
These Mannequins are all around Mr. Peterson's home. In the show, they are shown rolling towards and grabbing Maritza. Although, she's able to dispatch them with one hit of her bat.
Power box
Power boxes are littered all around the house of Mr. Peterson. Some are attached to jail bars, shocking those who touch them. Others are hooked up to door knobs.
Wall of Bells
Mouse traps
Mr. Peterson seems to have no shortage of traps. He placed these Mouse traps in an entire room. Although, as you see, they can be dodged by someone who has enough agility. They are used with other traps, like how these were just a distraction to a bear trap he had set up.
Spike Pit
Swinging Axe
Breaking a tripwire within Mr. Petersons home can be a death sentence. Literally, this giant axe will swing towards you if you do.
Chainsaw
Stepping on a floorboard can send a chainsaw down to chop you up. Health and safety has to be on this one, I don't care if it has a painting you can use to fix the chainsaw.
Sharkotron
Sharkotron is inside a flooded room in Mr. Petersons home. Having the apperance of a shark, the Sharkotron will latch onto anybody who gets too close. It'll also blare a loud alarm, alerting Mr. Peterson. You can pick up the object, if you figure out how to drain the room.
Crab Mech (Or Spider Mech)
Within the game of Hello Engineer, Mr. Peterson is constantly making traps for the kids to fall into. The final one of these chellenges is a Crab Mech, this really large mech that fires lasers. It's massive, far bigger than any home that Mr. Peterson has. During the final battle it's taking hits from large fireworks. This mech can also fire a consentrated laser to destory his enemies. Best part? He doesn't have to be in the mech to use it. He can call it to him with a simple press of a button, then control it remotely.
Powers and Abilities
The Wet Bandits
This is going to be unsuprising to everyone. The Wet Bandits do not have any powers and/or abilites. They're regular humans who have no abilites in their gounded worlds. Sorry Harry and Marv, you ain't taking anything here.
Mr. Peterson
Enhanced senses
Mr. Peterson's most well know ability is his enhanced senses. He can hear you anywhere in the house, whatever noise you make and run towards you at quick speeds. All it takes is one squeak and he comes dashing for you. Certain items, like the bear trap and camera, will make noise for the Neighbour. I bet you're wondering, "Why have you listed this as a power?" Because Mr. Peterson has some interesting abilites he can use.
Pathfinder
Pathfinder is a unique ability that allows Mr. Peterson to smell the fear that children have for him. As individuals get closer to him the mist becomes thicker.
Crow sense
Using crow sense allows The Guest to see little red dots on the map. As The Guest holds this down, these red dots become tighter and tighter to a victim
Mr. Peterson, while as the Clown, possesses the ability to camoflage. He can become any household object that he sees fit. The only issue is that these do have a mustache on the front, so any perseptive kid can see it coming. Damaging the Neighbour during this will also knock him out of the object.
Status Effect Reducement
Individuals who escape from the grasp of Mr. Peterson will be temporarily blinded with a flash of white, before having their speed reduced. It allows him to catch up to any children that have escaped his grasp.
Rage power
Enhanced agility
Our friendly Neighbour can preform a large leap as The Guest. If he hits a wall, he'll simply stick to it and be able to jump off.
Animal manipulation
Mr. Peterson can create a fake crow. These crows, within the world of Secret Neighbour, usually show where keys are. This one is a fake.
Sound manipulation
The Guest can let off a horrible scream. Anyone who hears it will become stunned and cause them to drop all of the objects they have in their hands. Oh, it has a 7 second cooldown.
Ghost physiology
This very scary foe can switch between a human and a ghost. As a ghost, Mr. Peterson can fly faster than kids and use his abilities. Their are some issues when becoming a ghost, as Mr. Peterson can't interact with anything. Any items he has will drop to the ground, he can't harm anyone, and he can't turn back if light exists. Good thing he has...
Light manipulation
Mr. Peterson, as the ghost, can turn off the lights near him using an ability.
Portal creation
The ghost can slip through walls and objects with a portal. He can see towards the other side, and leaves a stain that can block doors.
Teleportation
The Guest can straight up teleport. In the gif above, we see him teleport. Later in the game, we see The Guest teleport away from Aaron Peterson. We even see how this process works. there's also the argument that he's transforming into a bird? But either way, some freaky shit.
Weaknesses
The Wet Bandits
I gave some credits to the Bandits in the experience catagory. But, let's face it, they're incredibly stupid. They fall for every single trap that Kevin puts in their way to a constant degree. For as much as a lil psycho Kevin is, he is still just a human with no real experience himself. Harry, for being the smarter one, admits that he never made it past the sixth grade. Marv is so much worse. He fell for an old movie and firecrackers, thought that Arizona was a foreign country, and yaps 24/7. He's also extremely loud when stealing items.
Also, their durability isn't limitless. We all joke that the Bandits are these gods who should have died when the paint can hit their face. To a certain extent, they are. However, it's quite notable that they can get tired out. Old man Marley is able to knock the both of them out with his snow shovel, and the Pigeon Lady defeats them with some Pigeons. Does this mean that Harry and Marv are only shovel level? Or are those damn pigeons building level? I believe it falls somewhere in the middle, that Harry and Marv can be overwhelmed and eventually defeated. We can't really call these 'anti-feats' since they're integral to the plot of Home Alone 1 and 2. Marv in home alone 4 has an even worse anti-feat of being knocked out by some kids tripping him up.
You might disagree and say that they have unlimited durability. I'll bring that up in the verdict, but this is where I stand on things.
Oh, Marv is also scared of the dark, heights, and spiders.
Mr. Peterson
Mr. Peterson might seem like an impossible and unbeatable foe, but he does have a few weaknesses. Mr. Peterson can accidently step into his own bear traps and temporarily stun himself. He's also not much of a chaser, preferring to give up and play the long game. If he loses sight of you he'll likely go back on patrol. In some versions, he won't even leave his property line. He does have a slightly bigger weakness however.
His son. After the death of his wife and daughter, his son became the most important figure in his life. He will do anything for this child to keep him safe. The only issue? If any damage comes to this kid, he'll enters a raged state. This happens at the end of the Hello Neighbour show, where his son escapes the basement. This is what allows him to be caught by the police. He can also be tricked by noises.
He's also deathly afraid of The Guest, something that gets more confusing as you look into the lore.
Feats
The Wet Bandits
Overall
- Wanted criminals throughout Chicago and New York.
- Managed to successfully rob at least some homes within the area.
- Manage to catch Kevin on three different occasions
- Breaks out of prison off screen. With Marv doing this twice.
Strength
- Able to lift an 8-year old boy up.
- Although done accidentally, Marv is able to send Harry into the air.
- Gave me the strength to finish this blog.
Durability
(For this section, any feats labelled H will be for Harry and M for Marv)
Note: While they both scale to each other, it's interesting to note who takes what.
Yes, I am going to list every durability feat. Why? These motherfuckers deserve something for the pain they go through.
- Hit in the face by paint cans that swing down the stairs.
- They swing into a wall after their rope is cut.
- They slip on some toy cars (Seen above)
- Slip on pearls before falling onto concrete
- Marv is slapped for being a creep, Harry is slapped for being in the wrong place.
- Fall down incredibly high stories before hit by paint cans.
- Slammed into a wall by a heavy tool chest, causing them to reset their broken noses.
- Slipping on ice
- Shot in the balls by a bb gun. (H)
- Shot in the head by a bb gun. (M)
- Burnt hand on a red-hot doorknob. (H)
- Head lit on fire by a blowtorch. (H)
- Hit in the chest by Marv with a crowbar. (H)
- Hit by a falling Iron. (M)
- Steps on a nail before falling down the stairs. (M)
- Steps on some christmas ornaments, barefoot. (M)
- Launched high into the air before hitting a car. (H)
- Slipped on a ladder (H)
- Struck with a bag filled with hammers and wrenches. (H)
- Struck with four bricks in a row. (M)
- Staple gun to the ass, then the nose, then the groin. (M)
- Falls down a large hole. (M)
- Slips on grease before being knocked into a bookcase, before being knocked over. (M)
- Painfully elecrocuted by Kevin. (M)
- Hit by a 100 ton bag of concrete. (M)
- Head gets hit by a dumbwaiter. (M)
- Hit by a swinging pot. (M)
- Falls over before being hit by a bookcase. (M)
- Slapped by his wife. (M)
- Flying plane to the balls. This sends him tumbling down the stairs. (M)
- Hit by increasing amount of water pressure before falling down the stairs. (M)
- Hit in the head by a door. (M)
- Hit in the ass by a hook, before being forcefully pulled out the window. (M)
- Soaked in cheese fondue. (M)
- Spun around in a rotating wall before being flung across the room, landing on a chandelier. Marv falls onto the ground before being landed on by his wife. (M)
- Takes constant hits from different objects.
- Shot by a Crossbow in the ass.
- Hit by glue? Some sort of fast-acting sticky object.
- Gets his head set on fire by Kevin, only to take a dump in gasoline which blows up. (H) (0.011711281071 tons of TNT)
- KO'ed by Old Man Marley with his metal shovel.
- Overpowered by birds.
- Sent flying and KO'ed by two kids tripping them up. (M)
Speed
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- Can run, at least, as fast as an eight year old boy. Keeping up the stamina to do this while injured, but still slowing down.
- Faster when they're behind the wheels of a car.
- I don't know man, they aren't quick.
Mr. Peterson
Overall
- Accomplished genius. Created all of the tech around his home and hundards of amusement parks.
- Broke into multiple homes, schools, and stores undetected.
- Gaslight the entire town into thinking that Nicky Roth was insane, including his friends and family
- Engineered large race courses and spider mech suits.
- Almost flooded the entire town using a weather tower.
- Kept many children out of his house in Secret Neighbour.
- Held his own against members of the police force.
- Able to solve complex and difficult ciphers by the Puzzle Master.
Strength
- Used to be a prime football player in his youth.
- Able to lift up children with one hand.
- Punches Officer Cleave in the face.
- Breaks open a padlocked door .
- Throws around Police Officers.
- Able to fight and overpower himself As The Guest. (This lore gets confusing)
Durability
- Fine after having slingshots, boxes, anything that children can use hit him.
- Survives the car crash his wife could not.
- Isn't hurt by bear traps.
- Hit in the back by several Police Officers.
- Has debris fall onto him and survives.
- The biggest bird falls onto him. (I'm the biggest bird!)
Speed
- Faster than the average 12-34 year old.
- Described as "Running faster than a speeding bulldozer." By Mya and Aaron.
- Able to control his crab mech, which can react to cars moving at least 62MPH
Before the verdict
Bendy scaling!??!!?!?!?!?!
In a blindside move that nobody saw coming, Hello Neighbour had a crossover with Bendy And The Ink Machine. This is licensed by both parties. What does it do? For Hello Neighbour, it makes the entire world have this Yellow Filter and Mr. Peterson have a yellow Bendy mask. For The Neighbour, it replaces Bendy with Mr. Peterson, even the character of Sammy Laurence. So, boom, Bendy Scaling. Another W for Mr. Peterson, right?
Well, no.
I don't need to tell you that Mr. Peterson doesn't appear in BATIM and isn't the star of BATIM. This is a non-canon crossover specifically described as a mod.
The device and Reset Day.
You might be wondering, why haven't I given Mr. Peterson The Device? The Device is an object that allows the controller to decide fate. The Raven Brook Forest Protectors use this to cause all of the unatural weather inside of the town, manipulating their own luck. Mr. Peterson makes one of these. So, GG, right?
Not so much. This device gets stolen by the Forest Protectors before he can use it. So while he technically has made the thing, he's never shown using the luck to his advantage or creating a storm as wide as the town.
I've also lumped Reset Day into here. Reset Day, to put it easily, is a time-loop that Raven Brooks is stuck in. From December 20th to 27th, everyone will relive the same week within Raven Brooks. We don't know who causes this Time Loop, apart from it being heavily hinted at that it's Mr. Peterson, as he's the only smart guy who could pull something like this off.
Even if this was Mr. Peterson doing this, which is unconfirmed, this isn't combat applicable. Unless this fight is going on for a week, which I heavily doubt.
Marv can regenerate!?
When Marv is shocked by Kevin, he becomes a skeleton for a few seconds. Some people that this means that Marv can regenerate. Which, uh, is an interesting take? Given how grounded and human Home Alone is, this is likely nothing more than a visual gag. Kevin would have likely had something to say if he watched this man come back from a skeleton.
Peterson can regenerate!?
Peterson has, funny enough, a similar argument. Secret Neighbour's Halloween event shows Mr. Peterson with his head taken off, being controlled by a pumpkin instead. You can even play as Nearly-Headless Nick over here. As weird and as crazy as Secret Neighbour is, The Halloween event is 100 percent non-canon.
Sad day for Mr. Peterson fans.
Verdict.
(Art by U/AGtheOG_351)
Stats.
Somehow the most easy and confusing part to decide about the blog? In terms of overall stats, Mr. Peterson takes them. Starting off with strength, The best the Bandits have is Marv is launching Harry accidentally into the air. This required a few factors to pull off, however. Marv had to have a run-up and jump onto a wooden plank. It's very unlikely that this strength is something that Marv can whip out of his pants. So, what does that leave them with? The Strength to lift up Kevin. Mr. Peterson presents much more relevent strength feats. He's able to one-hand a simple child, where the bandits need to work together to lift Kevin, and even throw around fully grown Police Officers.
Durability is clear cut. While Mr. Peterson is no slouch, having large birds fall on him and crushed by debris, he's nowhere near the punishment that The Bandits take. Bricks, gasoline explosions, The Wet Bandits can take so much more punishment. So, easily point to them.
Speed is much more different story. They should be similar in travel speeds, showing nothing more than average human speeds. However, The Neighbour should take reaction speed. Considering he can control his crab mech, which can react to the cars in Hello Engineer, at a low-ball he's at least reacting to 62MPH cars.
This section was alot easier than expected. While The Bandits are goons for durability, they lack in strength and reaction speed, allowing Mr. Peterson to take this catagory.
Arsenal and Abilites.
The Bandits are very lacking in this margin. They have a crowbar, handgun, sticky hand, and van. Mr. Peterson can counter all of these and has alot more just with him. Cowbar? Mr. Peterson has one of his own, and his magnet. The magnet itself has shown the ability to grab Crowbars, so they'll easily be disarmed. The Gun? Same story. We also know that Harry's gun can stop working if something sticky causes it to jam. Considering Mr. Peterson has his glue traps, which'll also slow down The Bandits, this is useless. The Sticky Glove can also only stick smaller objects, so pretty useless here. The Neighbour also has other things he can use to hurt The Bandits. In a sticky situation? He can pop a smoke bomb and go back into his home. Need The Bandits seperated? One Meat Hook coming up! His tomatos can blind them, he has far more useful melee weapons like blades and shovels.
This is before we get to the house itself. With all of its traps, strings of bells, cameras, locked doors, Mr. Peterson doesn't even need to be in eyeshot of The Bandits to use alot of his abilites. Many of his traps will simply go off. Power boxes shocking them, falling into Spike Pits, chopped up by a chainsaw. You thought Kevin was manic? This guy is worse.
This is before we get to the house itself. With all of its traps, strings of bells, cameras, locked doors, Mr. Peterson doesn't even need to be in eyeshot of The Bandits to use alot of his abilites. Many of his traps will simply go off. Power boxes shocking them, falling into Spike Pits, chopped up by a chainsaw. You thought Kevin was manic? This guy is worse.
This isn't even to say about Mr. Petersons hax. His enhanced senses means that any sound the Bandits are making will be picked up. If he's caught in a sticky situation? Turn into a ghost, fly up, and open a portal to another room. He can switch off all of the lights, scaring Marv, who is notably scared of the Dark. Given the pathfinder ability, allowing the Neighbour to smell fear, he'd be constantly tracking Harry and Marv. They have a numbers advantage, but with Mr. Peterson's shark and mannquins, how long will that last? He can also just straight up teleport.
If the Bandits manage to get a few hits in, they could trigger his status effects. This would blind them, cause them to slow down even more, and give Mr. Peterson brief immortality. If Harry and Marv manage to wrestle the weapons out of Mr. Petersons hands, his supersonic screech could make them drop them all again. Also he can just become a box.
I've even forgot to talk about the Crab Mech. Considering the size of that thing, and the fact it can shoot lasers and move faster than The Bandits van, they'd get stomped by it.
Point to Mr. Peterson.
Any other factors.
The Bandits are way out of their league here. While they have broken out of prison, this is in an off-screen riot we don't actually see. They also lack any experience fighting someone with such a home like Mr. Peterson. Sure, Kevin had like a spider and such, but they've never had to fight gated off homes and guys who can fight portals. Mr. Peterson has way more experience fighting bandits. Nicky Roth, the engineering kids, all of them had months-years of prep against The Neighbour, only to be cut down by him. The Bandits, also lack any experience in physical combat. Mr. Peterson has proven he can hold himself against cult members and trained policemen. He's also just a better bandit than the Wet Bandits. He's broken into schools, homes, and supermarkets without anyone seeing.
Mr. Peterson is a genius. He's built themeparks, quote, "Across six continents." With some of his rides defying some laws of physics. He's shown to be great on the fly, able to fight against the kids and adults trying to get into his basement. He's also a master manipulator and a psycho. He gaslit Nicky Roths entire family into hating him, making them believe that he was insane. In the show, once captured, he drove Nicky to insanity, to the point he didn't want to escape The Neighbour.
Also, man, location advantage matters so much. I don't think I need to explain why "Man in own saw trap home." Is much better than "Guys with van who pulled up."
While The Bandits hold a samina edge, we know they can be tired out and knocked out. This is what Old Man Marley does in Home Alone 1. Even if Mr Peterson couldn't kill The Bandits, which, he can thanks to his mech being the size of a building, he could tire them out and get the KO then. Would it be a long fight? Sure. But one that Mr. Peterson can win.
Advantages
- Far more durable than Mr. Peterson himself is.
- Should be similar in strength unarmed.
- large Stamina edge.
- Number experience helps them at the start...
- Had more fun researching these two than anything Hello Neighbour.
- Joe Pesci's swearing is a national treasure.
Disavantages
- Much slower in reaction time, similar travel speed.
- Significant lack of intellegence means they'll keep falling into traps and falling for tricks like shapeshifting
- Lack of stealth means they could be tracked the entire fight.
- Location disadvantage. Mr. Peterson doesn't physically have to interact with them during the fight.
- Smaller arsenal + most of their arsenal is countered by Mr. Peterson, or he straight up has the items.
- Could easily be seperated by hooks, locked doors, etc.
- Lacks experience with a house like Petersons, Lack of physical experience means they wouldn't win a close encounter.
- Tiring them out is a notable weakness and could give Mr. Peterson a win.
- Constantly being debuffed by Mr. Petersons hax.
- ...only to be trumped by Mr. Petersons mannaquins, birds, and shark.
- Ghost mode could allow Mr. Peterson to switch all of the lights off, making Marv afraid and easier to track.
- Stomped out by the Spider mech.
- Home alone 4.
- Took all of those beatings just to have 152 years in prison.
Mr. Peterson
Advantages
- Much faster reaction time, similar travel speed and strength.
- Huge advantage with being in his home. He technically doesn't need to face the Bandits
- Items like his cameras, wall of bells, and bear traps constantly giving him infomation.
- Much larger arsenal. Counters the Bandits with most of them.
- Much smarter and more experienced than The Bandits. Specifically good at fighting Bandits
- Items like his Meat Hook and locked doors could seperate The Bandits.
- Could tire the Bandits out, while having no exploitable weakness of his own.
- Has uncounterable hax that can constantly be used.
- While his mannequins, shark bot, and birds allow him to take the numbers later on in the fight...
- Ghost mode specifically could turn all of the lights off, putting fear into Marv and making him easier to track.
- Spider mech solos.
- This is a replica of Andy's room from Toy Story.
Disavantages
- Cannot take as many hits as The Bandits.
- Has less stamina overall.
- ...Early on into the fight, lacks a numbers advantage.
- Made me research all the games, books, the show, the graphic novels, literally everything.
- I believe Matpat will enjoy dissecting this blog frame by frame
Final thoughts.
I did this blog for one reason, "Does Mr. Peterson stand a chance?" Suprisingly, not only does he stand a chance, he straight up wins. The constant field of infomation, the much larger and useful arsenal, Secret Neighbour giving him hax, having a mech, The Bandits are outclassed in every single way.
Harry couldn't even use the ol' "I'm a police officer!" Since Mr. Peterson won't even let them into his home, not anymore at least.
I've got a feeling that people are going to be upset with this verdict. This matchup, a lot of the time, is promoted as "The Wet Bandits killing The Neighbour!" Perhaps now this can introduce you to the crazy and wonderful world of Hello Neighbour lore.
Team Wet Bandits - 0
Team Mr. Peterson - 1 (Saulgoodmas)
One more thing.
If you made it this far, thank you so much! This blog drove me insane. I'm one, insane, yet dedicated man who spent 50 hours of his life studying Hello Neighbour lore. I have a few blogs planned in the future.
Jack Horner VS Chef Saltbaker (Puss In Boots VS Cuphead)
The Medic VS Dr. Edward Richtofen (TF2 VS Call of Duty)
The Borg VS The Cybermen (Star Trek VS Doctor who)
If you're interested in joining this blog, DM me on discord at saulgoodmanagain. I'm looking for people who could help calc all of these crazy things that I find, but researchers will help as well :)
Thank you for reading my blog. I'm now off to hide!
Very looking foward to Medic VS Richtofen. great blog.
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